"The older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to take care of their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God." Titus 2: 4-5
Friday, January 25, 2008
Birth Order of Children
I know there have been lots of studies done on this and many good books...but I think this is one of the best. What do you think?
BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN
confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
_____________________________________________________
Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing
didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
______________________________________________________
The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold
them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only
the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
______________________________________________________
Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up
the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your
firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
______________________________________________________
Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can
go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some
juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
______________________________________________________
Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or
not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain
about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
_______________________________________________________
Activities:
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing , Baby Zoo,
Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
______________________________________________________
Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home
five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number
where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees
blood.
______________________________________________________
At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child
isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children
______________________________________________________
Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the
hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the
coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his
allowance!
______________________________________________________
GRANDCHILDREN: God's reward for allowing your children to live.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Funny, MaryBeth!
I love this list! :)
I especially related to the "at home" section: "You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children" Ha!
So true, sad to say. What happens when number four comes along? I guess you end up with a Sam, hehe.
Isn't life great?!
That's funny, Ginger! :)
number four???? oh yea!!! a Sam I am is right!!! I love it. Be sure to see my next blog...you end up saying things like that every day. Ha
Post a Comment